Making friends. Everyone talks about it like it’s easy, but there are the challenges to overcome within it, just like most things in life. It can be tough to make new friends at the best of times, but what are you supposed to do when you lose friends? Sometimes, social media seems to do more harm than good for friendships, and I’m here to tell you what to do if things go south.

One day, I happened to be using Snapchat to talk to a friend who, at the time, I thought was close.  We were chatting, laughing and sharing like we’d been friends since birth, and eventually, we touched on trust and the problems caused by “fake friends”.  Deciding to look out for one another, we both said that no matter what happened, we would always have trust. I felt good; I had someone watching my back. Everything was in order.

Or was it?

On the verge of going to bed later in the week, we both said goodnight to one another. Suddenly, one last message appeared before my friend blocked me, completely at random! It shattered me; we had both promised to have each other’s backs against the dangers of fake friendship, and not even one week later she broke her word.

Rather than let it get me down, I went to speak to another friend. They simply asked me, “was she really your friend from the beginning?” Everything started to make sense after that. It all reminded me of a video I once saved to my phone, which has this to say:

People will come into your life, not to be there for you, but to take from you. They don’t want to help you: they are here to use you, so it is time to stop making efforts for someone who doesn’t care for you. Stop sitting there crying for them when they don’t cry about you. Unless they’re someone who will defend you, even if you’re not their priority, then don’t get your hopes up. This is the only way to avoid being disappointed.

At this point, it’s best for me to use the reality check of being blocked to my advantage and live as if I’d never met my fake friend. It’ll be difficult, but I know I’ve been shown the good people in my life: real family and friends who love me. I know now that I should be concentrating my time and effort on them and not those who want to hurt me.

So, are all of your friends really your friends? Unfortunately, a small amount of them won’t be. Life is about identifying those individuals and having that courage to cut them off, because we are all strong people; everyone has potential, but you can’t let your self-esteem or confidence be destroyed by one toxic person.