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Articles > Relationships June, 07, 2021

Aspiring relationship advice for teenagers

Finlay Daintry
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A relationship for a teenager can seem like the most important thing in the world. Here is my experience and ‘awful’ advice from someone who’s been through it.

I’ve always assumed the hardest part of being a teenager was going through a hell-hole of rumours, lies and laughter. Personally, it involved constant breakdowns and hidden tears in every crevice and classroom, private interaction lessons discussing my mental health and skipping classes to avoid the f***-boys in my classes.

This was my personal torture, this was my high school. Dealing with the floods of boys that break your heart whilst attending the prison of which hormonal girls loiter and chaos lives.

I didn’t have the easiest high school experience. Ask any girl arguing with her appearance, fighting with family issues or just smiling through a smashed up heart whether she enjoyed high school? She’s either going to lie through bare gritted teeth and tell you “it was the best time of my life”🤩 whilst playing with her hair awkwardly… or breakdown into floods of tears and admit to you “that it was the worse time in my life”😖.

I read in an article about a study that found a staggering 31% of girls and young women suffered with symptoms of anxiety in high school, college and University. In boys and young men, the figure is 13%.

The whole “girls support girls” thing is a facade. If anything, it is the total opposite, at least in my experience. Girls can lie to you, and act like demons behind their picture-perfect Instagram posts. On the other hand, boys will be nice to you if they want something bad enough.

The constant anxiety of looking pretty enough whilst learning what erosion means or remembering your prime numbers in your maths class… it shouldn’t be a factor in high school but yet it is. It is so that that boy you like notices you over the girls who were extremely popular with their 139 likes and 32 comments.

My Experience:

I can’t stress enough that you are beautiful, you’re loved and most importantly you are kind. If you’re like me, you’ve dealt with break up after break up and struggled to get your crush to notice you in maths class, smiling at him in the corridor. My tip – don’t stop, keep at him, his barriers will weaken and his soldiers will stop the fight. I was telling my friends that if he looks me in the eyes he’ll just have to fall in love with me. Luckily for me after getting some very exposing photographs spread around my school, my Prince Charming swooped me into his arms and promised me this was forever. After my up hill battle with a long list of frogs, he’d kissed me a fairytale. I’d like to say I was Princess Tiana but in retrospect, I was probably a Tiana after she kissed the frog and turned into one.

I did have my doubts, I mean come on. The man of my dreams spends 2 years avoiding me at every chance he gets just to realise I’m the one. Let’s not forget, he’s friends with all these boys who have used me and then ultimately abused me. Let me also remind you we came from two different sides of the pond. He was popular, every single girl had him in his top 3, understood? I’d flirt as if he’d marry me right on the spot. Yes, I was embarrassing myself in front of my man crush every day, whilst messaging him on snap asking if he was dating that girl he’d flirt with who was not me. He was adamant, that they were just friends I now know that they did in fact have a fling, which may or may not start arguments now and then. I’d like to say me pretending to watch the clock, but blatantly using the clock as an excuse to stare at him was what made him realise I was truly wifey material.

We’re coming into our 2nd year now. We’ve had a couple of hardships from his rude, ignorant group of baboons he calls “friends”, but he doesn’t care. My advice is to ride with it, it’s taken me ages to realise that as long as he likes me what does it matter if his big headed friends don’t? They act as if I’m the wicked step mother, however I am keeping Cinderella to myself and forcing him to stay in my basement. (Apart from that he doesn’t clean, he doesn’t Hoover and he definitely does not wash up).

I mean I’ve had a couple of comments on the way I look or dress or speak, but who cares? Words do cut deeper than knives but the moral is that so does a paper cut, if angled correctly that is. I’ve always let people ruin my day, by assuming they don’t like me when I have a family who love me at times and a boyfriend who loves me 24/7 through all my mood swings.  I’ve lost a couple of friends along the way due to the friends of my Prince and the ex of this old frog, meaning me. At times these people just assume I’m still in high school with the name-calling and dirty looks. But University is round the corner, grow up! Right now I’m worried about the distance between me and him. But we’ve made it through fake friends and flirting failures, what is a little bit of distance?


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